It’s the Final Countdown…of Leia Brooks’ 2014!

We’ve decked the halls, sung of old acquaintances and if they should be forgot, and begun our new resolutions.  It is time for Leia’s year in review.

Inspector Kemp and the villagers of Transylvania.  I am on the far right.

Early 2014 found me back at Columbia Entertainment Company, performing in Young Frankenstein.  I felt compelled to this show because 1) I’m a theater nerd, 2)  I teach Frankenstein, and 3) I have to support a fellow Brooks (even though Mel changed his given last name).  I got to work with some old friends again, make a new friendship with a former student, and forge new relationships with some incredibly talented people.  Through some of my theater friends I learned of a movie being shot in Columbia by a fellow MU graduate, and I got to cross off “being an extra on a film shoot” from my bucket list.  ADDicted stars Kathleen Quinlan (who my friend Danielle and I got to stand right behind!) and Gil Bellows (Tommy from The Shawshank Redemption) is scheduled to be released in 2015. 

As always, most of my life is spent at Hickman High School where I began my 15^th year in September. I am at the point where I have been teaching almost as long as my students have been alive, which is an existential conundrum because I feel like I just started this adult thing.  But I am almost halfway to retirement, so I guess I have been in the “real” world for a while!  In addition to World Literature (English 10), I added a new prep in the 2014-2015 year with Contemporary Literature for seniors.  So far I have enjoyed this class, but once senioritis kicks in full force next semester, I may change my toon! 

Along with the later half of 2013, this was the year of the wedding for me.  On New Year’s Eve I watched my former student teacher Kate Eady tie the knot in Columbia.  I had a slight reprieve until May when my friends Ryan and Kara Nesbitt got hitched in St. Louis.  Then came June…with three weddings!  Two more Kates – my theater buddy Kate Manion and my co-worker Katie LeVota wed in Columbia, while I gained a new cousin when Carrie Noonan wed Scott Bokal in St. Louis.  I had just enough time to celebrate my birthday and Fourth of July before another theater friend and neighbor Elizabeth Schuster married Eric Brown.  If Macy’s or Bed, Bath, and Beyond had frequent flier cards, I would have been a platinum member!  It has been a great honor to watch so many wonderful people make their lifelong commitments to one another. 

Treena and I before zip-lining with Arenal Volcano behind us.

I finally got to add another stamp in my passport this summer when Treena and I ventured to Costa Rica for a week.  Navigating the roads which do not have signs was quite an endeavor.  Treena will argue that I wasn’t very successful in my Ponce de Leon attempts to guide our journey, but I beg to differ!  We spent the first part of the week in Samara at the beach where we snorkled, surfed, and stayed in a tree house.  We literally were steps from the beach so we were living la pura vida!  We then ventured north to La Fortuna and the Arenal Volcano area.  I experienced my first “thril-seeking” adventure when we went zip-lining.  While jumping out of planes hold no interest for me, zip-lining was incredible!  We also hiked to Cerro Chato – a dormant volcano next to our hotel.  The trip was supposed to last 2-4 hours.  It took me almost 5 because it was not a hike but a climb!  After that adventure I definitely needed the trip to the hot springs we took the next day.

I wish you all joy, hope, peace, and happiness in 2015.  And of course, I wish you a year full of good reads.  Here are my 10 recommendations for your to-read list.   Because the first entry is actually 5 books, I kind of cheated with this list.  These are not just books I read this year, but I have read them all!          

(* indicates book club selections)

1.   Game of Thrones – Fire and Ice Series by George R.R. Martin  Yes, there are 5 books.  Yes, they are ridiculously long (I bought it for my ipad and it is almost 8500 pages in the digital format).  Yes, Martin needs some series editing help.  So why am I included these books on my list?  Because they are incredibly engaging.  It is a fantasy story that spans multiple countries, many main characters, political intrigue, liars and deceivers, manipulators, and dragons.  You’ve got to love dragons!

Book Club:  The Kitchen House, June 2014

2.              2. *The Kitchen House by Kathleen Grissom: 

      When a 7 year-old from Ireland gets orphaned on

      her passage to the United States, she becomes an

      indentured servant in antebellum Virginia, so she

      grows up and identifies with the slaves, even with

      her blonde hair and fair skin.  I read this book in

      about a week because the story is so engaging. 

3.  Bossypants by Tina Fey :  I sort of feel like I 

     cheated in “reading” this one because I listened to 

     the audio version (thanks Aunt Barb), but when      

     you have the author telling her own story in her 

     distinct voice and you laugh aloud while driving 

     by yourself, you know it is a good read.  The 

     young teen angst, the trials of being an intelligent 

     women, the ridiculous situations you  find yourself 

     in that sound completely fictional, but they are 

     totally real – it’s all in this book.  I feel like Tina 

     Fey and I would totally hang out if only we lived in the same town…

4. Much Ado About Nothing:  This is my absolute favorite of Shakespeare’s plays.  It has the star-crossed lover theme of Romeo and Juliet without the suicidal ending, the jealousy-fueled behavior of Othello with no murders, and the strong female characters of The Tempest without the cross-dressing.  Beatrice may be one of my all time favorite characters because she is sassy and bold.

5.  *The Circle by Dave Eggers:  It seems like dystopian novels are everywhere, but this one is not that far in the distant future.  The main character takes a job at the Circle – a Facebook, Google, Twitter hybrid that literally controls the world.  As she gains responsibilities, more computer monitors are added to her desk so she can virtually interact with more and more people. 

6. Divergent by Veronica Roth:  This series brought back the joys of my youth when I couldn’t read a book fast enough.  I started the series after seeing the movie (a rarity for me) and I finished all three books in two weeks.  This was in the middle of the school year!  The plot is engaging, the characters have flaws and virtues, and the main character being a kick butt woman is pretty cool too!

7.  *The Weight of Blood by Laura McHugh:  A Columbia, Missouri author wrote this compelling story set in the Ozarks.  It reminds me of Winter’s Bone with a teenager as the main character, searching for the truth about her mother. 

8.  A Lesson Before Dying by Ernest Gaines:  Gaines’ story of a young black man, Jefferson, on death row for a crime he didn’t commit in rural Louisiana in the 1940s paints a very real picture of the complexities of race relations and how the past continues to haunt.

9.  Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen:  Let’s face it – Mr. Darcey is sort of realistic literary fantasy man.  He’s full of flaws, he says the wrong things, and he is willing to defy his family for love.  And Elizabeth Bennett is his equal – quick with a witty retort, devoted to her not-always-deserving family, and stubborn to no end.

10. *China Dolls by Lisa See:  Honestly, I liked Snowflower and the Secret Fan more, but China Dolls is more accessible.  Three girls, each hiding secrets, meet, work together, and live together in San Francisco.  Japan’s invasion of China, World War II, and Japanese internment camps all affect these women, forever shaping their relationships.     

Leia

That's amore...

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2006

I've always disliked Valentine's Day.

Perhaps my disdain began to grow when I threw a Valentine's party in 4th grade. The only person who showed up was my best friend Lori. I remember trying to make a cake, not greasing the pan correctly (me, not being a culinary expert?!!) and having the cake fall apart. So I put it in a bowl and sprinkled powdered sugar on top. I must have made other things too because I walked around the neighborhood, looking for someone to share my food with.

Once I got to junior high, suddenly Valentine's Day became about romantic relationships - something I didn't partake in often. I was always insanely jealous of those girls who cared around flowers and candy and teddy bears. I wanted a secret admirer (or even one who made himself known) too. Though I hated Valentine's Day, it still held that mystery. Perhaps this year would be the year when Cupid's love arrows would strike and I would finally get the man I deserved.

When I was a freshmen in college I went to the movies with another single friend on Valentine's Day. The people behind us were laughing and joking and we overheard them saying "are those two lesbians?" I wasn't bothered by being called a lesbian, but I was angery that Valentine's Day had to be about romantic love. Why couldn't I just be out with a friendly guy (if you don't know "language" you don't realize that "guy" is a term for all manner of objects - regardless of gender)?

Last year was the first year I ever had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day. And though it was nice enough, it still didn't live up to the expectations I had formulated. There was no delivery of a dozen long stemmed roses at work. (Though he did send me flowers to work once when we started dating - just because). There was some chocolate, and I think a dinner, but it wasn't the magical, unrealistically hyped holiday Hallmark has made it out to be. 

This year I am once again boyfriendless, but I hope (with the aide of good friends who constantly remind me how lucky I am to have such amazing people in my life) to make Valentine's Day about the true love in my life: The friends who send me flowers at school when I've had a bad day; the amazing, intelligent women who share my love of reading, wine, and having a good time; the co-workers who always know when I need to hear positive praise, or when it is finally time to break down after being asked "Are you ok?"; the people who let me see the real them - who trust me enough to know I'll love them for it; the family who appreciates my calls and visits and who doesn't let me get off the phone without saying "I love you"; the kids at school who challenge me everyday - even when I don't think I can handle it. 

I don't need the moon to hit my eye like a big pizza pie, because THAT'S (see above) really is amore.

Happy Valentine's to one and all.

All the World's a Stage

(From January of 2014)

"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts"


Shakespeare's right.  Within our daily lives we play so many roles.  In one week I will be a teacher, mentor, colleague, learner, friend, "auntie", daughter, actress, singer, home owner, gardener, consumer, attempted softball player - the list goes on and on.  No one fulfills just one role in his/her life.  As we try and make our way through our own life story, we also find ourselves as supporting players, antagonists, sidekicks, and chorus members in other's lives.  In many ways we juggle multiple shows simultaneously; hopefully not forgetting too often which performance is currently in production.


In a truly balanced world, we would be able to focus most of our energy on the show where we are a principle lead - our own story.  Our supporting roles would then be next on the list of time consumption.  These are our responsibilities - to guide our friends or try and combat our foes in their own productions.  And of course we have occasional cameos or walk on roles with those who we don't really know.  Sometimes our lines are throw away and sometimes we are scene stealers.


Right now my life production is in a holding pattern.  I feel like a few scenes are under my belt, but we are at intermission and there is no direction for the second act.  Frequently I have a trip or something to look forward to during the summer which may provide some type of possibility.  But this summer is pretty bare.  I am going to try and change that situation, but I don't know if that will happen.


And though there isn't much progress with my show, what hurts the most is that appearance wise, everyone around me is developing Academy Award winning scripts.  New additions to families, creations of families, finding partners, changes in jobs - these all lend themselves to better stories.  And I am proud to be a part of these stories.  I am so happy for my friends who are having babies.  I am honored to be close enough to throw baby showers for these wonderful mamas and daddies.  


I just wonder the inevitably cliched question - when is it my turn?  When do I get to have a wedding or baby shower?  When will people I know become supporting characters in my life story?  Will I get to have a leading role one of these days, especially in my own life story?  Sometimes I equate this with roles I have played in the theater.  I have yet to really have a "lead" role (though in Pump Boys and Dinettes all 7 of us were essentially the principals) and I sometimes struggle with this.  I know the reality - I am not the ingenue, the romantic lead, the soprano who can hit every high note.  But I am also a pretty good comedienne and I do have a strong messo-soprano voice

Frequently I feel like the actor in my own life story - not the director.  

War is not the answer...

WITH ALL THE FREE TIME I HAVE IN THE SUMMER I HAVE BEGUN DOING ODD THINGS:  BINGE WATCHING Game of Thrones, cleaning out old photograph albums, and googling myself.  Because, you know, every once in a while you need to do that.  I forgot that I had started a blog once before.  IN an effort to keep my ideas all together I am reposting here.  

THURSDAY, APRIL 13, 2006

As a bleeding heart liberal, I have never been a big fan of war as a means of resolving an issue. I work with high school kids - I realize the innate fallacies in a plan that says "Do what I want (or stop doing what you are doing) or I'll hurt you." We tell our kids violence is not the way to solve problems, yet we have one of the largest militaries in the world. Hmm, can we say hypocrisy?

Yet I'm not naive enough, or enough of an optimist, to think that the world could operate without armament. I just wish it didn't have to be at the expense of so many people's lives.

My brother enlisted in the army in September 2005. He will be shipped out to Iraq in June or July. The last time I'll get to see him in over a year will be this Saturday. My brother and I aren't the tightest siblings around, we fought like nobody's business when we were little, but as we've gotten older, we've gotten closer. There are some things that no one, except your sibling, can share with you. Nobody else can share exactly what it was like walking into our brand new house in Canton, Georgia. Nobody else knows the exact trauma we caused each other when we dressed up as the "manly woman" and the "womanly man" when we were little.

Adam and I grew up together. He's only 20 months younger than me, but he'll always be my baby brother. We went down different paths - I was always a schooly, he struggled because of his learning disability. I was a "goodie two shoes" kind of kid; Adam was always getting in trouble. My wildest taste in music was Nine Inch Nails; Adam was in a death metal band called Axe Minister. I'm the uber liberal in the family; Adam leans to the right of center. We're on different roads - but we started at the same place. And our paths WILL intersect again - many a time. I keep telling myself this, because the alternative is unthinkable.

So while I don't support a war which is more about our interests in foreign oil than anything else, I do support my brother and hope he does not have to see, or be a part of, irrevocable traumas and tragedies. We have so many naturally occurring bad things - let's not make any more for ourselves.

2013 Wrap

Wrap-up of 2013…Leia Brooks style!

The Christmas lights are starting to come down, the gluttony of holiday eating has passed, and now New Year’s Resolutions are being decided upon.  Yep, I have waited an appropriate amount of time to bombard you with one final end of the year highlight reel about my life.  I have finally accepted the reality that this is not my Christmas newsletter, but my end-of-the-year wrap up.

 Purple Cow 2013 featuring selections from "Wop", "We are Never Getting Back Together", and "Hot Cheetos and Takis" - I'm in the blonde wig

During 2013 I completed my 13^th year teaching at Hickman High School and began year 14.  Fortunately I was able to continue team teaching World Studies with my great partner teacher Lindsey Troutman.  I am also teaching one section of Humanities this year and two sections of English 10.  Because I have so much extra leisure time when I am not planning and grading (ha!), I have added on some extra duties.  This year I am one of two faculty sponsors of the Hickman Review, which is an art and literary magazine created by high school students. I am also continuing to sponsor Trireme, an honors organization for senior girls who commit to volunteering 4 hours a month.  One of the great joys of working at Hickman is seeing the incredible altruism these high school students exhibit.  Every year the student body raises over $40,000 for charities including the True Life Film Fund, the Red Cross, Special Olympics, and the Voluntary Action Center of Columbia.  And, we find awesome ways to raise these funds, like our Purple Cow lip sync contest.  In 2013 my group members and I were unable to retain our title as champions, but another teacher group proved that HHS teachers school the students when it comes to making an idiot out of ourselves on stage while lip synching!

My travels this year were not as expansive as years past, but I did get to move about for work and for my own leisure. I have continued working with the Missouri Writing Project, specifically with the Scholastic Art and Writing awards and I got a chance to introduce author Matt de La Pena at the annual Write to Learn Conference at Tan-Tar-A.  This was a great honor and my students were very excited to know I got to meet the author of so many books they enjoy (We Were Here, Mexican Whiteboy, and Ball Don’t Lie).  I also got to travel to the East Coast, presenting at NCTE (National Council for the Teachers of English) in Boston right before Thanksgiving. Though I didn’t get to do many “touristy” things, I did get to experience the original Boston Cream Pie at the Omni Park Hotel and I was able to walk part of the Freedom Trail.  There were also some great meals spent with colleagues at Durgin Park and Mr. Bartley’s.

I was also able to indulge in some non-nerd down time.  In July I road tripped with 10 friends (Danielle and Josephus Johnson, Ryan and Jayme Pingrey, Matt Foster and Carolyn Chipley-Foster, Dana and Brian Sleeth, and Susan and Grant Elliot) to Seacrest, Florida where we rented a beach house called “My Blue Heaven”.  With the ocean a 5-minute walk away and the 60,000 square foot pool a 4-minute walk away, we didn’t spend much time at the house.   On our last night we chartered a boat for a 3-hour sunset cruise where dolphins frolicked around us (and we participated in the mandatory “I’m on a Boat” reenactment).  This was the epitome of a relaxing vacation with great friends, good food, and the creation of a new drink (Sunrise on Seacrest). 

The Seacrest Crew on our Sunset Cruise

This was my second group trip with Matt and Carolyn (we went to Dauphin Island, Alabama in 2011) and they proved to again be great travel companions.  Matt suddenly and tragically passed away in October, which has made the memories of the trip bittersweet.  I am grateful for the wonderful times we had on vacation, at tacky Christmas sweater parties, and on the softball field. 

I wish you all joy, hope, peace, and happiness in 2014.  And of course, I wish you a year full of good reads.  Here are my 10 recommendations for your to-read list.                (* indicate book club selections)

1.   Where’d You Go Bernadette by Maria Semple:  A beautifully written, heart-warming and hilarious story of an agoraphobic, her husband and daughter, and a fateful trip to the Antarctic.
2.  Gulp by Mary Roach:  From the same woman who wrote Spook, Gulp chronicles the ins and outs (literally) of the digestive system.  Sounds ridiculously academic and boring, but it is incredibly fascinating and written with an appropriate amount of levity.

3.   *The Light Between Oceans by M.L. Stedman:  I was moved to tears by this book.  A lighthouse keeper and his wife live on an isolated island off the coast of Australia, struggling to have children.  When a dead man and an infant wash up on their shore, they struggle with telling the truth or accepting the child they have tried for.

The Light Between Oceans - Book Club selection for November 2013

4.   *Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn:  If you haven’t read it yet, do so before the movie comes out.  This is a thriller you cannot put down.  On their 5^th anniversary Amy goes missing and her husband Nick is the prime suspect.

5.   Will Grayson, Will Grayson by John Green and David Levithan:  Disclaimer - John Green is my nerd crush, so I love everything he does.  This book tells the story of two high school boys (both named Will Grayson) who fortuitously meet in Chicago.  Poignant, hilarious, and resonating with truth.

6.   Fall of Giants by Ken Follett:  Follett is not known for his brevity (this book is around 900 pages), but he begins his Century trilogy by exploring the lives of families throughout the globe in the early 1900s.  From Russia, to Wales, to D.C., to Germany Fall of Giants shows us the historical causes and impact of World  War I by setting it within fictional families.

7.   World Without End by Ken Follett:  The second part of the Century Trilogy centers around World War II.  A second generation of characters introduced in Fall of Giants show just how interconnected we all are.

8.    *And the Mountains Echoed by Khaled Hosseini – From the author of The Kite Runner and A Thousand Splendid Suns comes another beautifully written book.  Chronicling a family through 50 years, switching perspectives throughout, Hosseini proves he is a master storyteller. 

9.    Frankenstein by Mary Shelley:  I teach this to my World Literature class and every year I am amazed by it.  Shelley was only 17 when she began this work and it still resonates 180 years after it was written.  If you think the monster’s name is Frankenstein, read the book.  And then come see me and an amazing cast in Mel Brooks’ Young Frankenstein at Columbia Entertainment Company in February. http://www.cectheatre.org/

10. Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling:  Mindy has become my hip, Hollywood alter-ego.  She is smart, funny, and ridiculously adept at pop culture.  Be prepared to laugh out loud with this collection of creative non-fiction.

Leia

Resisting the pull of the tide into a sea of depression

Preface:

One of the many reasons I am a writer is because it is free therapy.  Through writing I can articulate my hopes, fears, struggles, and conundrums.  Yet I find that most of the time when I feel compelled to write it is because I am facing a struggle and I don't know how to deal with it.  Sometimes this manifests itself in ways that make it seem like I am just a self indulgent writer who is always "depressed".  Contrary to the evidence, this isn't true.

Yes, I am depressed in the sense that I struggle with depression and anxiety issues.  Yes, I tend to write when issues arise which provide fuel to the fire of my chemically imbalanced, though behaviorally modified, brain.  This isn't a snapshot of me, but a snapshot of one part of my life.  And in an effort to make it more understandable for those who may get depressed, but don't suffer from depression, I thought I'd try and explain what that experience feels like.  Here's my attempt...

*********************************************************************************

As someone who suffers from depression, I don’t need any help feeling bad about myself.

No, I’m not a self-mutilator, or even a self-hater.  I think I am a pretty cool chick, happening in a far out way.  (Or at least I am goofy enough to pay homage to The Brady Bunch movie in my description of myself.)  My form of depression manifests itself in a different type of insidious, pervasive thought process of being alone forever.

Certain times this feeling is harder to combat.  Weddings are glorious celebrations, but I have no desire to participate in the tossing the bouquet tradition.  As I have watched more and more friends marry I have also watched the median age of the single ladies plummet beneath my age bracket.  After about 11 unsuccessful catches in the metaphorical game (and many years of not dating in the real-life game) I decide I wanted to not have a constant reminder of my singleton status.

I have an incredibly talented friend who takes extraordinary pictures of families, especially little ones.  I marvel at her skill and joy in the beauty she captures.  But I also sometimes break down into tears because I feel that a family is something I will never have.  I think “I will never have a need for her services, never have a group of people to know I had a hand in creating or raising.  My Christmas newsletter will never need a photographic representation of my partner in life, because I don't have one.”

I vacation with friends and have an incredible time.  I don’t have to worry about the sleeping arrangements – I am going to get the “kiddy” pirate bed that isn’t actually in a room, but an alcove.  I don’t have to worry about the lottery in choosing amongst a wide range of bedrooms – from secluded King, to a Jack-n-Jill bathroom with a bunk bed arrangement.  But I don’t get to cuddle with someone as we take a nighttime walk on the beach.  I am in awe of the stars, mesmerized by the ebb and flow of the ocean, and feel the force of a higher power as land and sea roll into one.  Amidst observing the hand of God in action, I am shaken from my reverie.  I fold my arms around me, trying to contain the aching sadness as I stare into the ocean, trying to avoid watching those around me marvel at the beauty of the sea, just like I did, while holding hands with their partner.  The only hands I have to hold are my own.  Unwillingly and brought upon by nothing I do, I feel jolted into a lonely reality where I can't even enjoy the beauty around me.

It doesn't take a majestic site for me to experience this sense of isolation, and it doesn't always happen when you'd expect it.  I don’t have a problem being a 3^rd or a 5^th wheel when dining out, or dining out alone.  I love sharing meals with friends and I love having the chance to read, work, or people watch at my own pace when I am by myself.  When out with a large group - the 7^th wheel or higher – that is when it becomes painful.  We aren’t being counted anymore individually, but by couples.  And I am always left out of that arithmetic.  “I’m on my own check,” feels like another twist in my heart, yet another reminder that I am adrift alone while everyone else seems to have a double occupancy flotation device.  

Like everyone who suffers from depression, I can physically see the reality of my situation.  I am not alone.  I have friends, coworkers, family, and countless compadres who will help me, no questions asked.  I know this cerebrally, but my emotions do not experience the same thing.  I ache for what I don’t have, and my skewed biological make-up wants to tell me that it is something I will NEVER have.  I don’t want that to be true.  But wishing won’t make it so.  Hoping doesn’t make it happen.  Not focusing on it doesn’t change anything.  Actively seeking a partner has yet to provide any fruitful results.  So what is left to do besides despair and feel that this is my reality – a reality I am not content with?  Today, I am struggling with that answer, feeling like it is almost pulling me under.  

And then the "Hallelujah" chorus can begin, because putting these thoughts on (virtual) paper has helped me exorcise these demons (at least for a little while).  I don't feel as helpless as before.  It doesn't always happen this way - many times I write what I am feeling and all I feel afterwards is worse.  But eventually, sometimes weeks or months later, I am able to to look back, and look ahead, with less feelings of dejection and sadness.  Looking forward doesn't always give me a glimpse of happy sunshine, birds chirping their happily-ever-after tunes, and promises of a rosy future.  But I can recognize the hope a new day can bring.

If you have never stumbled across the blog Hyperbole and a Half, do yourself a favor and check it out.  The writer (Allie) chronicles her own journey with depression in a way that is hilarious, insightful, and spot-on.  Check it out here:  http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html.

(Also, if you, like me, take great joy in absurd responses to ridiculous errors in communication, you'll love Allie's blog entry about the "Alot" monster.  This is her way of control the visceral rage that befalls many of us nerdy English people when we see sentences like "I play alot better than my teammates." http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html

"The The-a-ter, the the-a-ter, oh what has happened to the the-a-ter..."

Five bucks if anyone can name the musical the post title comes from.

My ubber-talented theater friend Adam McCall once said that being in a production together bonds cast-mates because you experience a trauma together.  While "trauma" might be a bit of a hyperbole, it is also a fitting moniker.  There are tears, struggles, times you want to quit, times you really just want to be able to skip rehearsal and sleep, and times of profound connectedness with the rest of the cast (and if you are lucky) the audience.  

I am missing the connectedness of my theater friends.  I just might need to dust off my character shoes and prepare a monologue for a show sometime soon. 

I serve many roles in a cast, but one of my most favorite roles is the quote master.  These phrases may not make sense at all, and honestly I have forgotten the back story of some of these, but they remind me of the trials, tribulations, and triumphs of last year.  So, here they are -  The Drowsy Chaperone Quotes.

Columbia Entertainment Company, Summer 2012

“Do you want me on top or bottom?”  Meg

“That’s what she said.”  Kate

“My ding-a-ling, my ding-a-ling”  Christopher

“I don’t even know what that means!”  David

 “What is your man-smell?”  David to Larry

“Jesus Christ”

“The C natural is causing problems…don’t let it.”  Robin

“SURPRISE!”

“That’s not going to get old.”  David and Leia in unison

“We’ve been exposed – that is the goal.”  Robin talking about music

“If your pee is yellow, you are doing it wrong.”  Robin

“Two measures – it’s always TWO MEASURES!!”  Robin

“I haven’t kissed a girl since junior year of high school.”  David

Kissing DeeDee for her birthday, “That’s it.  I’m straight!”  David

“Squeeze the nuts!”  Meg (oops!)

“That’s a tausty Toledo Surprise!”  Christopher

“Hold on to the “dong” for 6 beats.”  Leslie

“Gangster – don’t whack.”  Jeremy

“We’re gangsters – we have to whack.”  Tom

“It is really cold in here and it smells like boys.”  Ella (at First Baptist Church)

“Just be confident on that ding-a-ling”  Leslie.

“Bring your drill.”  DeeDee

“I was in such a hurry I forgot my pants.”  Jay

“I won’t complain”  Leslie

“We have to be funny because we can’t sing that high.”  Monica explaining bad behavior by altos.

“What????  Surprise!”  Monica while texting

“Each of you will grab something for Jordan”  Kristin

“I’ll grab the dildo.”  Monica

“Grab your business.”  Kristin

“I gotta stretch my cooter.”  Jordan after doing the splits

“You all will need to get off somehow.”  Kristin

“I can get them all off.”  Leslie

“There’ll be a lot of pulling out tomorrow.”  Leslie (talking about being pulled out by Robin for music.)

“Huh, huh, huh”  Monica

“I’m very in touch with my feminine side.”  Christopher

“He is – I saw him touching it earlier.”  Monica