"The The-a-ter, the the-a-ter, oh what has happened to the the-a-ter..."

Five bucks if anyone can name the musical the post title comes from.

My ubber-talented theater friend Adam McCall once said that being in a production together bonds cast-mates because you experience a trauma together.  While "trauma" might be a bit of a hyperbole, it is also a fitting moniker.  There are tears, struggles, times you want to quit, times you really just want to be able to skip rehearsal and sleep, and times of profound connectedness with the rest of the cast (and if you are lucky) the audience.  

I am missing the connectedness of my theater friends.  I just might need to dust off my character shoes and prepare a monologue for a show sometime soon. 

I serve many roles in a cast, but one of my most favorite roles is the quote master.  These phrases may not make sense at all, and honestly I have forgotten the back story of some of these, but they remind me of the trials, tribulations, and triumphs of last year.  So, here they are -  The Drowsy Chaperone Quotes.

Columbia Entertainment Company, Summer 2012

“Do you want me on top or bottom?”  Meg

“That’s what she said.”  Kate

“My ding-a-ling, my ding-a-ling”  Christopher

“I don’t even know what that means!”  David

 “What is your man-smell?”  David to Larry

“Jesus Christ”

“The C natural is causing problems…don’t let it.”  Robin

“SURPRISE!”

“That’s not going to get old.”  David and Leia in unison

“We’ve been exposed – that is the goal.”  Robin talking about music

“If your pee is yellow, you are doing it wrong.”  Robin

“Two measures – it’s always TWO MEASURES!!”  Robin

“I haven’t kissed a girl since junior year of high school.”  David

Kissing DeeDee for her birthday, “That’s it.  I’m straight!”  David

“Squeeze the nuts!”  Meg (oops!)

“That’s a tausty Toledo Surprise!”  Christopher

“Hold on to the “dong” for 6 beats.”  Leslie

“Gangster – don’t whack.”  Jeremy

“We’re gangsters – we have to whack.”  Tom

“It is really cold in here and it smells like boys.”  Ella (at First Baptist Church)

“Just be confident on that ding-a-ling”  Leslie.

“Bring your drill.”  DeeDee

“I was in such a hurry I forgot my pants.”  Jay

“I won’t complain”  Leslie

“We have to be funny because we can’t sing that high.”  Monica explaining bad behavior by altos.

“What????  Surprise!”  Monica while texting

“Each of you will grab something for Jordan”  Kristin

“I’ll grab the dildo.”  Monica

“Grab your business.”  Kristin

“I gotta stretch my cooter.”  Jordan after doing the splits

“You all will need to get off somehow.”  Kristin

“I can get them all off.”  Leslie

“There’ll be a lot of pulling out tomorrow.”  Leslie (talking about being pulled out by Robin for music.)

“Huh, huh, huh”  Monica

“I’m very in touch with my feminine side.”  Christopher

“He is – I saw him touching it earlier.”  Monica