To Be Continued
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Travel Memories - Hasse Halley
To Be Continued
I get by with a little help from my friends
Recently some people I love and care about have had to face some difficult struggles. Medically, financially, and emotionally, they have needed someone to assist them. Sadly, I was told that apart from me and a few other family members, my loved ones felt like they had few people to turn to. This got me thinking about two, seemingly contradictory realities:
1) Ultimately, we will spend large portions of our life alone.
2) I am so blessed because my family who would support me if I went through a crisis consists not only of my blood relatives, but a group of friends who have become part of my family, and a group of amazing coworkers who have supported each other through trials, tribulations, and joyous moments in life.
"Like it or not, alone is something we will be quite lot." Dr. Seuss's aphorism from Oh the Places You'll Go is a reality check for anyone embarking on a new journey in life. There are many people who wouldn't necessarily consider themselves their own friend. This saddens me because I truly believe if you don't love and value yourself, how can others? So much of our life seems to be dedicated to seeking approval from someone else - a boss acknowledging the work you do, a significant other to make you feel worthwhile, a friend who can validate your decisions. But what about seeking self approval? That seems to fall by the wayside.
In some ways, I really admire my loved one's acceptance of this harsh truth. To Be Continued...
1) Ultimately, we will spend large portions of our life alone.
2) I am so blessed because my family who would support me if I went through a crisis consists not only of my blood relatives, but a group of friends who have become part of my family, and a group of amazing coworkers who have supported each other through trials, tribulations, and joyous moments in life.
"Like it or not, alone is something we will be quite lot." Dr. Seuss's aphorism from Oh the Places You'll Go is a reality check for anyone embarking on a new journey in life. There are many people who wouldn't necessarily consider themselves their own friend. This saddens me because I truly believe if you don't love and value yourself, how can others? So much of our life seems to be dedicated to seeking approval from someone else - a boss acknowledging the work you do, a significant other to make you feel worthwhile, a friend who can validate your decisions. But what about seeking self approval? That seems to fall by the wayside.
In some ways, I really admire my loved one's acceptance of this harsh truth. To Be Continued...
Why are women defined by the men (or lack thereof) in their lives?
I just came home from watching Snow White and the Huntsman. Even though I am a secret Twihard fan, I have always been a bit bothered by Kristin Stewart. I feel like she spends the majority of her screen time breathing and batting her eyelids rather than actually having some hutzpah to say something of significance. Snow White did have a rousing monologue where Stewart's character does rally the troops and encourage them to fight the good fight. And she does put on the chain mail to ride into battle alongside the men. But when it comes down to the actual fight with the evil Stepmother, she seems a bit of a wuss. (Until of course she happens to know exactly where to knife the evil Queen so she will die and not she is not immune to the countless other blades which have been wielded her way.)
What truly bothered me as a writer and read about the film is its lack of focus on a genre. I don't need to see everything pigeon holed into categories, but I do tend to like my films to be cohesive. This movie tried to hard to be an action adventure at times, a romance at times, an anthem for girl power at times, and a heroic journey at times. Now these do not have to be mutually exclusive, but I was really thrown by the potential love interests into this story. I know our fairy tale version demands the kiss of true love to awaken our pale maiden from the evil spell, but it seemed unnecessary for Snow White to have two suitors. Is the movie then about her quest to figure out which one is right for her (after all, only one of them broke the curse)? Is the movie about her quest for vengeance over her father's death? Is it a survival story? A battle between good and evil? A damsel in distress who needs not one, but two hunky men to help her, along with the skills of some wily dwarves?
This got me thinking about a constant fixture in American cinema and media - the necessity of a man to define a woman. Think about the "chic flixs" that are supposed to appeal to women and what are they about - a 30+ career woman who doesn't have time for a relationship but happens to meet the right man, an ugly duckling who needs a prince to bring her out of her shell and into her pure beauty, that great guy friend in a women's life who just doesn't see her as a potential girlfriend, a woman who is defined by some ass hole move by a man in her life (abandoned father, abusive husband, douche bag fiance) who is finally redeemed by a man who sees her true worth.
You see this even in supposedly "empowered" tales. Yes, Kristin Stewart pulls on the chain mail to fight, but she has to get the obligatory "You look fetching in chain mail" from Chris Hemsworth. And while that isn't a compliment I would ever be opposed to if it was thrown my way, does Snow White really need to wear a dress that happens to fall off of her shoulders so we can be amazed by her décolletage? Here's an image to ponder in what we are teaching with co-ed casts of superheros.
male superheroes posed as women
It may not seem like it, but I am a romantic at heart. I do believe that the love and commitment couples share can truly make life a shared journey. And let's face it - life is too difficult to try and handle it solo. But there are so many other relationships besides romantic (or in the case of comic books, overly sexual) that are worthwhile too and prove that our lives are not lived in isolation. Women - we must not continually define ourselves by whether or not we are in a relationship, whether or not we've been done wrong by an ex-boyfriend, and stop waiting for a white knight to come to our rescue. We are all obliged, as members of humanity, to rescue each other and ourselves occasionally.
Men face this same judgment which causes us to define or defend ourselves in terms of our relationships to the opposite sex (or same sex depending on your orientation). Our identities are somewhat intertwined with those whom we hold dear. Those people though should be a part of who we are - not the basis for initial description. And it seems to be so ingrained into feminine culture and media that a woman without a man as a touchstone for her identity is a woman incomplete.
To that I say, my identity is about me and who I am. And if I chose to include relationships in that description, that is my purgative. In trying to figure out the theme of Snow White and the Huntsman, I am afraid the filmakers got to focused on Snow White's quest and how it was entangled in the men of her life rather than truly focusing on what it was that drove her.
Now I am done with my feminist, analytical rantings on the fairy tale world and media portrayal of women. Time for some shut eye so I can find a new topic to bet fired up about!
(Sorry for the random highlighting. I don't know what I did formatting wise, but I can't undo it, so it is just staying there!)
What truly bothered me as a writer and read about the film is its lack of focus on a genre. I don't need to see everything pigeon holed into categories, but I do tend to like my films to be cohesive. This movie tried to hard to be an action adventure at times, a romance at times, an anthem for girl power at times, and a heroic journey at times. Now these do not have to be mutually exclusive, but I was really thrown by the potential love interests into this story. I know our fairy tale version demands the kiss of true love to awaken our pale maiden from the evil spell, but it seemed unnecessary for Snow White to have two suitors. Is the movie then about her quest to figure out which one is right for her (after all, only one of them broke the curse)? Is the movie about her quest for vengeance over her father's death? Is it a survival story? A battle between good and evil? A damsel in distress who needs not one, but two hunky men to help her, along with the skills of some wily dwarves?
This got me thinking about a constant fixture in American cinema and media - the necessity of a man to define a woman. Think about the "chic flixs" that are supposed to appeal to women and what are they about - a 30+ career woman who doesn't have time for a relationship but happens to meet the right man, an ugly duckling who needs a prince to bring her out of her shell and into her pure beauty, that great guy friend in a women's life who just doesn't see her as a potential girlfriend, a woman who is defined by some ass hole move by a man in her life (abandoned father, abusive husband, douche bag fiance) who is finally redeemed by a man who sees her true worth.
You see this even in supposedly "empowered" tales. Yes, Kristin Stewart pulls on the chain mail to fight, but she has to get the obligatory "You look fetching in chain mail" from Chris Hemsworth. And while that isn't a compliment I would ever be opposed to if it was thrown my way, does Snow White really need to wear a dress that happens to fall off of her shoulders so we can be amazed by her décolletage? Here's an image to ponder in what we are teaching with co-ed casts of superheros.
male superheroes posed as women
It may not seem like it, but I am a romantic at heart. I do believe that the love and commitment couples share can truly make life a shared journey. And let's face it - life is too difficult to try and handle it solo. But there are so many other relationships besides romantic (or in the case of comic books, overly sexual) that are worthwhile too and prove that our lives are not lived in isolation. Women - we must not continually define ourselves by whether or not we are in a relationship, whether or not we've been done wrong by an ex-boyfriend, and stop waiting for a white knight to come to our rescue. We are all obliged, as members of humanity, to rescue each other and ourselves occasionally.
Men face this same judgment which causes us to define or defend ourselves in terms of our relationships to the opposite sex (or same sex depending on your orientation). Our identities are somewhat intertwined with those whom we hold dear. Those people though should be a part of who we are - not the basis for initial description. And it seems to be so ingrained into feminine culture and media that a woman without a man as a touchstone for her identity is a woman incomplete.
To that I say, my identity is about me and who I am. And if I chose to include relationships in that description, that is my purgative. In trying to figure out the theme of Snow White and the Huntsman, I am afraid the filmakers got to focused on Snow White's quest and how it was entangled in the men of her life rather than truly focusing on what it was that drove her.
Now I am done with my feminist, analytical rantings on the fairy tale world and media portrayal of women. Time for some shut eye so I can find a new topic to bet fired up about!
(Sorry for the random highlighting. I don't know what I did formatting wise, but I can't undo it, so it is just staying there!)
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